Kaminey Kritics!

I don’t remember any movie in a long time whose pre-release fuss was so much. Honestly speaking, I get a little excited and little more curious with all this kind of stuff. Ever since I saw the trailor of Kaminey in march [when I was watching Pink Panther-2. No! I don’t want any comments on this, coz this post isn’t about that] for the first time, I knew I’ll be seeing it as soon as it gets released. My only tiny apprehension was regarding Shahid Kapoor. Just that, he really can’t act. But I convinced myself, coz the movie bore the tag of Vishal Bhardwaj. That was March.

Aah! The notorious bollywood strike was here. April. May. June. July saw the unveiling of the music of  Kaminey. And also, the very famous Dhan Te Nan. So far so good. Then there were the tracks Pehli baar mohabbat ki hai and Raat ke dhai baje. Things were looking better. We’ll get to see an intelligent movie; probably the first one after DevD.

Two days before the release of the movie, I read this review. Things haven’t been so good ever! I was super excited. I couldn’t wait for it’s release. I’ve lost count on the number of attempts I made to book the tickets. Online, Offline. All Failed! Because, my ATM Debit Card is neither Visa or Mastercard. But I was content. I was watching it on saturday. Not too shabby for me. And I already had plans to watch it again sometime in the coming week. Yaayye!

Saturday, 15th of August. This was the first time I was not watching a movie in PVR in Delhi, attributed to apparent unavailability of tickets. Duhh! We were at 3Cs in Lajpat Nagar. The movie hall was good. The company which I had was even better.

Cut to the movie. The movie [almost] began with a very sensual lip-locking between Shahid and Priyanka. Very realistic! Very passionate. Instantaneous turn-on. With respect to the movie, ofcourse. 😉 Half an hour into the movie, there was just this one chasing sequence which got me to the edge of the seat. And I wanted to be on the edge for the rest of the movie too. I was glad! Finally, the movie is really ‘starting’. Little did I know that it’d be last time I’ll be on the edge in a 3 hour long ordeal. Well, ‘ordeal’ would be a little too harsh word to use. It was a nice movie. When I say ‘nice’, all I mean is that it wasn’t bad. Definitely not good. The disappointment which I felt after the movie was over was not because of Vishal Bhardwaj [or even Shahid Kapoor!], it was because of the reviews and the hype.

The movie had nothing which the critics claimed it did. You can compare Vishal Bhardwaj to Quentin Tarantino in a very broad sense of word. But you just can’t compare Pulp Fiction with Kaminey. So Not done, dear reviewers! I’ll never understand why Guddu stammered, or why Charlie lisped, or why Shahid wasn’t made to dance [the only thing which he is really good at]; probably not till I am alive and in my right senses. And I’m very sorry Priyanka, I didn’t fall in love with Sweety -like we did to Geet in Jab We Met– simply because she was hardly there in the movie. Apart from the hand-held camera work, there was nothing extra-ordinarily brilliant about the movie. It is so not the most well edited movies of recent times. Let’s not talk about DevD, but even Gulal was much better edited. Vishal Bhardwaj ji, I think you had too-much-to handle in one go. Go Charlie Go was good. But not Charlie, or Guddu, or Sweety! Gulzar sir did justice, and so did the music director in Vishal Bhardwaj. But that was pretty much it.

This review, is more like a review of reviewers rather than of the movie per se. I think I’ve lost faith in you people. May be, me and my friends should start our own reviewing service.

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I Never got Past ‘The Past’

I happened to visit the place where I lived from 1989 to 1995. It was a chance encounter, the visit I mean. I didn’t plan it. I was passing by that lane, and almost impulsively, I took a left turn instead of going straight.

I don’t know about other people, but I can recall my childhood pretty vividly. The labyrinthine lanes seemed so pregnant with past. So much so that it almost gave me goose bumps and involuntarily, I started returning. I had to coerce myself not to. The lanes had a proper road with tar and all [as opposed to the bricks which they used to have previously]. They were so not the same as they used to be, and yet I had a striking familiarity with them. It also reminded me of all of the childhood friends which I had. I lost touch with them as soon as I left that place, and I’ve no idea of even their physical appearance now. I don’t think I’d be able to recognize them with their face anymore. Just a moment, I think I should name them all here. Who knows one of them might see this and get in touch. The names are [as much chronological as possible]- Mohit, Golu, Ekta, Ashu, Nishu, Chhotu, Betu, Prateek, Little, Mini, Garima. This is pretty much it. I really don’t know their proper names, so pardon me for that. The dusty ‘park’ where we used to ‘play’ now has a 4 storey house.

Then I saw the home where I used to live when I didn’t go to school. Astonishingly, it was still the very same! Superficially, nothing had changed there. That was some sight. Plastic Ball Cricket, the first day at school, my thumb nail getting squished, getting drenched in rain, bathing in sun light during winters, the doordarshan, death of Rajiv Gandhi.. these are some of the things which I remember with utmost clarity. My reading habit started from the newspaper report of assassination of Rajiv Gandhi. It was such sensational news of its time that I thought, damn.. only if I could read and understand everything written on that boring and awkwardly ‘huge’ newspaper. [No, the newspapers didn’t use to be any bigger than they’re now, but I was too small for them :P].

Our landlord, Gupta ji [who was almost a grandfather figure to me] is no more. The name plate was engraved with the dreaded letters LATE. I think I felt a lump in throat for no good reason.

I never knew I’d be so connected with my past, but as it turns out.. Apparently, I am. And much later, I realized that this what I’ve been wanting to do for quite sometime now. Sometimes, living in past is not such a bad idea at all.

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